Torn
by ClearEyes
Summary: SPOILER ALERT: If you haven't seen the sequel to How to Train Your Dragon, stop reading and scroll past this small drabble please. Snoggletog is the beautiful time of the year to spend with family and friends. In the Bewielderbeast's nest is also a time for the hatchlings to be born. What are the thoughts of a lonely woman who's family was left behind in the Isle of Berk?


Torn

**Spoiler alert: If you haven't watched the sequel of How to Train Your Dragon, then don't read.**

**It's me again, the second update this day! This is a small drabble I wrote with my feels towards "How to Train Your Dragon 2". That was the movie that helped me get out of my writer's block, and if you've seen it, you can understand the feels. I uploaded it on Tumblr and I thought, why not? I've seen much hate towards Valka, of how she wasn't a good character, how she appeared badass only to be defeated and many more things I disagree with. And so I wrote this piece to try and understand her, to make her justice. Please, ENJOY!**

She was there when the hatching season began. She was present when the baby dragons were born and rushed to their mothers. She watched as they were taken care of, as they were fed, all in the peace of the Bewilderbeast's nest. Cloudjumper was inexplicably absent, but she didn't mind because at that moment she'd rather stay alone with her thoughts.

It had been months since Valka had been abducted from her home. She still didn't know why, although she suspected that Cloudjumper perceived she was in danger living with the man who threw an axe at its head. The dragon recognized she was different and… took her. For a long time now she was struggling with the idea of staying in the nest or going back to her village, where her husband was… where her son was.

If she wasn't mistaken, Snoggletog was about to happen, if it hadn't already, back in berk. It would be Hiccup's first, and she would miss it. And Stoick… he would be alone, even after they promised to stay together through their life. He probably thought she was dead if he hadn't sent a search party. Why would they trust the dragons to keep her alive? Perhaps it was better this way, perhaps Hiccup would be safer if she wasn't a part of his life. After all, she couldn't kill a dragon to protect her son.

She couldn't kill a dragon to protect her son. She didn't want to kill a dragon, even when it was inches away from her baby. What if the dragon had been more ferocious? What if the dragon was enraged at the moment he entered the house? The dragons weren't prone to attack without reason, but that night during the raid there had been a lot of noise and Cloudjumper might have been nervous… It could have killed Hiccup as she watched in the sidelines, unable to protect him.

Yes, he would be better off without her. He would be better off thinking she was dead. However, looking at the new baby dragons with their mothers, she couldn't help but get homesick. She felt guilty, because she should be doing just that with her son; she felt jealous because the dragon mothers could be with their baby dragons; but above all, she felt an incredible longing. She wanted her baby in her arms; she wanted her son, her Hiccup, as tiny as he was, with her in that moment. She wanted to kiss him, to bathe him. She wanted to be there when he gave his first steps, when he said his first words… she wanted to be there to see him become a man.

But then, with a father like Stoick, would she like the man he would become? In his resentment, she knew that her husband wasn't going to forget, he wasn't going to forgive. Would her Hiccup grow up to carry on with the war? He was the chief's son, after all. Would her Hiccup grow up as stubborn as his father, intent on avenging his mother's death by killing as many dragons as he could?

She didn't know, and she probably never would. And as she watched the hatchlings with their mothers, she let her tears run down her cheeks, conflicting emotions in her head and in her heart, missing her family but feeling she would hurt them. She was torn, torn between having to choose between two different kinds of families, all the while fearing she wouldn't make the right one.

**How was it? Probably too short, but that's why it's a small drabble. I didn't want to extend it too much because it was supposed to be brief. Besides, as it was for Tumblr, there my one-shots are much shorter than the ones I post directly in FFnet. Please, if it's not too much to ask leave a review telling me what you thought about this story. Perhaps, if I get enough reviews, I'll write a companion ship about Stoick at the same moment. Who knows, right?**

**Until we meet again,**

**ClearEyes.**


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